Over the past couple of months, I have gotten the chance to learn a lot about myself. The move from Eden Prairie, MN to Kansas City, MO has been very transitional for both my husband Andy and I. While it has been very good for the two of us to get to know each other, it's been hard so far to get to know other people. I know it will take time, and in this time I have been able to get to know me a little better.
In the process of quitting my old job, where I had a place full of people that I knew and was comfortable with, and trying to find a new job, which sounds easier than it is, I spend a good amount of time alone. This is not all bad. Andy is around a lot considering he is a grad student, so we get to spend time together as a couple. But as for the rest of the time, not having a job yet leaves me at home with not much else to do but apply for jobs of course, clean the apartment, and keep up with the dishes that used to pile up in the sink.
With all of this free time on my plate, I have had the chance to discover something about myself that I never really knew. I love to cook. Along with my on-again off-again relationship with drawing and painting, I now have a new love. There's just something about being able to express myself in the art of making food for the people I love that is very fulfilling.
So I guess my point is this, until I can fill my time with work that I actually get paid for, I am choosing to look at this potentially depressing situation not as an endless streak of bordum and loneliness, but as the chance to spend some quality time getting to know myself, and doing what I love. Real life will come again soon enough, but for now, I'm enjoying the moment and trying not to let the feeling of uselessness get me down.
Anytime I'm in kansas city you are more than welcome to cook for me. Haha!
ReplyDeleteI would LOVE to!! Just let me know when you're here!
ReplyDeleteI am just at the beginning stages of that useless feeling. Trying to figure out what to do with all my time since I got laid off last Monday. So what is the story about you moving back here or staying there?
ReplyDeleteWe have decided to stay here. Andy only has 3 semesters left and moving takes a lot of time, work, and money that which we do not have right now. Although we were very excited to be back with all of you guys, we feel like right now is not the time. But we miss you terribly and hope to see you every time we are in MN if possible. So sorry to hear about your lay-off. :( I have been battling the useless feeling for a couple months now. It's not easy, but I have found that as long as I can fill my time with other things, and even if I don't really feel like doing anything but sit on the couch and watch TV, I just need to remind myself that it's temporary and to take advantage of this time that I have to spend figuring myself out. My passions, my dislikes, and mostly my relationship with God. It has been a very developmental time for me and my faith. Just keep your chin up, appreciate the time you get to spend with your boys and maybe finding something about yourself that you never knew was there. You'll find another job, it may take some time, but just try to take advantage of this time of stillness and peace. If you ask me it's better than always being too busy to do the things I enjoy. But hang in there Raquel. Find peace in God's plan and direction for your life and take time to enjoy the moment. Love you!
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